You Still Have Time...

"You still have time." 

That's what we keep telling ourselves. And maybe we do. But maybe we don't. The truth is...we never really know.

Time isn't generous. It doesn't pause. It doesn't warn. It slips through our fingers quietly, like sand...soft, silent, and unstoppable.

We measure our lives in years, in birthdays, in milestones. But life isn't made of years. It's made of moments.

And the hardest part is...we don't know how many moments we have left.

You might have a hundred more sunsets to watch, or only three. You might hear your mother's voice on the phone a thousand more times, or maybe you've already heard it for the last time...you don't even know.

You might get one more chance to say, "I forgive you." Or none.

You might still have time to hold your child while they're small, while their arms still fit perfectly around your neck, while they still say "I love you" without needing a reason. But those moments pass. Quietly. And once they're gone, they don't come back.

We live like we are invincible. We make plans as if time is endless. We say, "I'll do it later." "I'll call them next week." "I'll chase that dream when things settle down."

But what if they never do?

What if tomorrow never comes? What if the life you're waiting to live is passing you by right now, this very second?

What if this moment---this exact one---is the last chance you have to say what matters most? To hold someone you love without distraction. To cry without shame. To laugh without holding back. To be fully alive?

This isn't meant to make you afraid. It's meant to make you aware.

Because there is nothing more tragic than realizing too late that you were sleepwalking through the days that could have changed everything.

So please...wake up.

Look up from the screen. Call someone you miss. Apologize if you need to. Say the words you've been swallowing. Do the thing that terrifies you but lights a fire in your soul.

Stop waiting for the "right" time. That time is now. Right now. This breath. This heartbeat.

You don't need more time. You just need to stop wasting the time you already have.

Because in the end, it's not the years you'll remember. It's the conversations, the embraces, the risks, the tears, the laughter, the love. The moments.

So live for them. Cherish them. Protect them.

Because life isn't measured by how long you live...it's measured by how deeply you feel, how boldly you love, and how fully you show up while you're still here.

And you're here. So make it count.

Still learning to capture the moments in time, here you will find me...in Mary's World.

Guest Author: Sufia Jamil (found on FaceBook)...too good not to share!!! 

Pictures by: Lindsey Lewis...(daughter and photography creator extraordinaire) 

Decisions That Cause Pain or...Love Can Be Painful

 

I made my grand-baby cry last night. Something a grand-parent never wants to do. Yet, a decision had to be made, and in retrospect, it may have been the least productive one, for it caused great disappointment and emotion.

She and I have played guessing games from time to time, and I feel like I just lost this one. There is one called "which hand is it in", where you put something in one of your hands, stretch both behind your back and pretend to switch out whatever the "thing" is, between the two. Then bring both hands front and center, and the other person guesses which hand it ended up in. This was what I was doing with the situation at hand. In one hand was, "Do I ignore the fact Momma only has 5 minutes more of work and is expecting us there at that time (a 10 minute drive...already late), and give in to our little girls desire?" Or, in the other hand, "Do I do everything in my power to make sure both are well taken care of, especially since it was a school night, and our little is still in recovery mode from being sick?" Our girls momma (our daughter) has been extensively stretching herself for quite some time now, so I leaned toward getting her home to prepare her girl for the evening hours. At least, that was what I felt best...

Earlier...right after picking her up from school, she had laid her head on the dining table (very tired), with arms outstretched and asked me to "tickle" them. Her mom used to love that also. She spent the next 5 minutes, or so, relaxing to the soothing touch of fingers gently gliding over her arms. I thought she had gone to sleep, but no. 

Today was "mail day" for her, in which the "mailwoman" left a bottle of nail polish. So she painted my fingernails. I asked if I could fix her something to eat, but she had other plans that didn't fit in the narrow window of time we had remaining. She opted for just 2 slices of plain bread instead of a sandwich or something cooked. So maybe that would hold her over until she got home to eat with mom. She was ready to go to the park on this beautiful day, even though it was only 15 minutes before we had to take her to her mom. 

The day didn't end well, and I haven't slept all night because of it. I've gotten a lot of things done, however. Childs car seat has been removed and disassembled, liner washed and dried, base of car seat scrubbed and sanitized with Pine Sol, all car seats, body straps and strap locks cleaned and sanitized; hair brushes soaked in vinegar, rinsed, and now soaking in baking soda waiting to be rescued; a sink full of dirty pots and pans are washed and drying; a ton of boxes are now broken down for disposal (this is the time I will get mega online orders and need them); 3 loads of laundry almost complete, coffee brewing, and finally I get to stop for a bit. And it's only 4 AM. After a small break, I'll get back to the kitchen and do a little organizing before my body demands sleep.

I am so very grateful for family. For grace when it's needed the most. For a great place to call "home" and for all the challenges life provides us. It's been said, and I agree, "It doesn't matter how many times you fall (or fail), it's how many times you get back up."

Today, I will be apologizing to our little girl and letting her know how sorry her Grams is for causing such hurt in her little heart. I know none of us (including her) is exempt from a mirage of feelings as life is lived. I just don't want to be the one causing that pain, or anxious thoughts. For her, for any of us really, life can show itself difficult when we're tired, hungry, and just not feeling so well. I should have considered that a little more than I did.

"When my heart is overwhelmed, lead me to the Rock that is higher than I (paraphrased)". ~Psalm 61:2

As always, here you'll find me...in Mary's World