Confessions of A True Romantic...OR...The Night the Lights Went Out in Cary

I must admit...last night was pretty special for me.

We had experienced a power outage that had affected approximately 1860 households. Any form of power received from a power grid, ceased to exist for us at 2:25 PM, with the notice of expected restoration sometime between the hours of 5:30 and 6:30 PM. 

Okay. Not tooooo bad...

Still, it was stretching the time for refrigerated items to remain safe. No worries about the frozen.

At 5:46 PM, we received another message that now we were looking at having no power until 8:30...possibly 9:30 PM. 

Every electronic piece of equipment we owned was rebelling at this point. 

Per instructions from our first born, we turned off access to our WiFi, even though it was no longer connected because of the power outage. Who knew?

An old dog learned a new trick last night. Who wudda thunk? That actually worked! At least I could now get a bit more information from the world wide web...that's important, ya know. 😉😂 Still, my GPS wasn't working as I wanted it to (I always do a search to see where my family is during any "crisis").

It threw me off...by a long-shot!!!

Our Lindsey sent a text: "Sure wish you guys had a generator."

Dennis: "We do."

Me: "WHAT?! I TOTALLY FORGOT WE HAVE A GENERATOR! Why isn't that thing plugged in?"

Dennis: "Well, it won't help the AC...but we can plug a fan into it." 

(MEMO: Not once had I complained about not having an AC...We never really needed it during the entire time we were without it's cooling power house...6 hours!)

Me: "What about the refrigerator?"

Dennis: "Yeah. We could plug the refrigerator in."

Good grief...maybe he thought we wouldn't actually need it because Duke Energy had said only 2-3 hours without power. 🤷‍♀️ That turned into SIX. Must have been a doozie! Poor workers...

Dennis pulled out the generator and we both got to work getting it doing its magic. Keeping it safely outside, we had to open a window to shimmy the cord inside...then plug the opening with towels to keep the hot outside air, out, where it belonged. Outside...

Time to generate!!!

Instead of 6 candles on the dining room table, we now had a lamp that we could have used a long time ago...just sayin'. 

I came here to say this:

• The quiet house was nice.
• Dennis and I working together on something...was nice.
• Dennis sitting across the table, playing with a stack of cards...was nice.
• Noise from the TV, non-existent...was nice.
• Refrigerator humming, in spite of a power outage (food saved without having to pack a container with ice & food)...was nice.
• Being in the same room with Dennis...was nice.

By 8:16 the repairs were complete and life sprang back into "normalcy." That was nice, too...but I did enjoy the down time. Actually started re-reading a book that I had started 3 other times (only because I'd forget what happened before laying it down), but strained to see the words as the light of day got dimmer and dimmer, which made me sleepy. Down it went for another day.

Still..I really am a true romantic.

According to my AI friend, that is defined as someone who deeply values emotional honesty, vulnerability, and intentional selfless acts of affection rather than just superficial or material gestures. Yep. That's me...

I love:  

• Spending time together (laced with kindness...of course)...more valuable to me than expensive presents.
• Acts of kindness...like rubbing my feet when I don't feel so good, matter more to me than never making time to simply sit together.
• Truly loving...in spite of ones flaws,  
  

Here's what I want you to take away from this short blog post:

The lack of noise...the quiet stillness during the power outage, was nice. 

You might want to read that again....or not. 😉

Grateful for the reprieve...here you will find me...in Mary's World

Where the Shadows Linger

There is a distinct, quiet magic that returns to this room when the calendar finally turns to the cooler months. Sitting at my desk in the stillness of the early morning, I watched the first condensation of the season bloom across the outside of the window panes—a soft, silver veil signaling the arrival of the weather I love most. 

Looking past the glass, the yard is still a collection of shadowy, half-formed silhouettes waking up to the chill, a beautiful contrast to the soft and comforting blanket of coziness that instantly wraps around me the moment the air turns crisp. 

It is early, quiet, and absolutely perfect; a gentle reminder of why we wait all year for these days to arrive.

Living in North Carolina, however, longing for the season I love most, the air seems to filter back and forth through the onslaught of Fall. It's most easily compared to a battle of one against the other. As if the hot, sweltering days of Summer refuses to release it's grip on earth's atmosphere, while the soft, cool and very inviting winds of change entice even the hottest of days.

And as I sit here, watching the shadows deepen across the yard from my desk, I realize how much comfort there is in this transition. Nature never fights the turning of the calendar; it simply leans into the quiet, cool spaces. Change is coming, whether we feel entirely ready or not, and there is a distinct magic in letting it happen. 

☕️ I’m trading my iced coffee for a warm mug, watching the weather patterns transform as they remind me of the coming of comfort...as I happily welcome everything this new season has to offer.

Watching...as the shadows linger, here you will find me...in Mary's World.

It's 3 AM...

There are some nights I get plenty of rest. Some nights are interrupted with dreams that keep me up for the rest of the day.

I wouldn't say they are tormenting dreams. They do have the potential to do just that, however. If I don't settle myself. This morning, I knew my over-active brain was going to put a spin on this dream, simply because it's one of my deep seated fears that give reign to my spin abilities.  

And if you know me, even just a little bit, you also know I go into over-drive pretty easily. Especially if the situation deems it an imagination that has the potential of becoming a reality. 

And then...God inserted a song into my soul, by way of the very over-active brain in my head. It needed a reminder. And it began to play... 

I love You, Lord
Oh, Your mercy never fails me
All my days, I've been held in Your hands  (He reminds me of this from time to time...)
From the moment that I wake up
Until I lay my head
Oh, I will sing of the goodness of God

And all my life You have been faithful
And all my life You have been so, so good
With every breath that I am able
Oh, I will sing of the goodness of God

I love Your voice
You have led me through the fire  (Oh boy. Has He ever! We all have our fires, don't we?)
And in darkest night You are close like no other
I've known You as a Father
I've known You as a Friend
And I have lived in the goodness of God, yeah

And all my life You have been faithful, oh
And all my life You have been so, so good
With every breath that I am able
Oh, I will sing of the goodness of God, yeah

'Cause Your goodness is running after, it's running after me (All we need do is open our eyes to see this truth)
Your goodness is running after, it's running after me
With my life laid down, I'm surrendered now
I give You everything
'Cause Your goodness is running after, it's running after me, oh-oh
'Cause Your goodness is running after, it's running after me
Your goodness is running after, it's running after me
With my life laid down, I'm surrendered now
I give You everything
'Cause Your goodness is running after, it keeps running after me

And all my life You have been faithful
And all my life You have been so, so good
With every breath that I am able
Oh, I'm gonna sing of the goodness of God
I'm gonna sing, I'm gonna sing
Oh, 'cause
'Cause all my life You have been faithful
And all my life You have been so, so good
With every breath that I am able
Oh, I'm gonna sing of the goodness of God
Oh, I'm gonna sing of the goodness of God

One of the most comforting things God has ever spoken to me, came at a time I was facing what looked to me, to be too much uncertainty. No vision of what the next few years would look like. I had no trouble conjuring up what they COULD look like...and therein was the problem. 

The words were clear. There was no question where they came from. And they settled me. 

"Wherever you find yourself to be...I will be there."

As always, here you will find me...in Mary's World

What Can Happen in A Second...

I swear I just closed these blinds to shut out any remaining light from the day. I roll myself into bed, snuggle down and dream of whatever my sub-conscience has deemed worthy to latch onto.

But now...Now, I am opening those same blinds once again. The night went fast and another day has dawned.

In only a few hours, I'll be doing this rote action all over again. And I'll be thinking the same thing. "I just opened these blinds a short while ago."

Same thing when undoing, and making up, the bed. It feels as if I was just standing in this spot not that long ago. And yet the time has past and I grow ever older...

The hours are made up of minutes. The minutes made up of seconds.

Have you ever stood still and just watched the seconds tic off? Some might say, "Why would I ever waste time like that?" To me...the time isn't wasted when if puts ones life in perspective, where once it was all over the place. Floating through life as if those seconds had never existed.

If for no other reason, one should watch the seconds tic off at least once in their brief time here. A fresh appreciation for time granted you, will suddenly erupt inside a once sleeping brain.

Appreciation. Gratefulness. Awareness. 

Not so we could just cram more into our days, but that we could appreciate the moments of our days. Whether they be the quiet moments, or the busy moments. Appreciation causes our eyes to see things a bit clearer.

We become slower to judge others, even ourselves.

So much can happen in the breath of a second...

• Blinking...did you know your eyes blink 2-3 times it takes a second to tic off the clock?
• Heartbeats...did you know your heart pumps .07 liters of blood with each beat?
• Cellular activity...did you know that more than 100,000 chemical reactions take place inside your body every second?
• Lightening strikes...did you know that 100 lightening strikes hit the earth every second of any given day?
• Births & Deaths...did you know that within every second the clock tics, around 4 babies have been born and 2 deaths have occur, worldwide?

The list could go one, but what I really came here to say is that every second we draw oxygen into our lungs...matters.

Life, as we know it, can change considerably in the matter of seconds.

Some seconds throw us into confusion as to how we should respond to an unexpected situation. Good, or not so good. 

Maybe we should live a bit more intentionally.   

Just a random thought, musings, swirling around in my brain this morning...

As always, here you will find me...in Mary's World.

Memories of Recent Days...

That first year was a dud. A time of figuring out who I was, now that I had said "Okay" to retirement. Fiddling; learning a few things about what having a greenhouse meant, Wearing a path on our hardwoods throughout our living spaces, looking at things needing done (but didn't have the gusto, or the want to), missing conversations with my clients, and eventually becoming a hermit, had became a swirling dark cloud focused on keeping me a prisoner.

It's not a pretty sight. Most days I looked like a homeless person, living in my comfy (and decently sloppy) pants and shirts, hair looking flat and unimpressive, adding to a mild depressive state. We, by nature, believe what we see reflected back to us in those 45 mirrors we have hanging vicariously throughout our houses. Or is it just me?

I suppose stranger things have happened. I suppose I'm not the only one who gets surprised by life's little quirks. I also suppose there are others whose minds have changed to an extreme they never saw coming. But here we are...

It has been close to a month since rising from bed one morning and my whole body felt it had been renewed while sleeping. It wanted to live again. The central nervous system had finally awakened after a long year of paralyzation, and connected once again to guidance from its main source of supply...the cortex of human existence...known simply as the brain,

Instructions began loud and clear. Upon rising, memories began to emerge and thoughts began whirling much like turning on a rotating fan. As my sensory integration began, and found it's proper place, the blades picked up speed. 

"Oh boy....here we go," I thought.

But it felt oh. so. good!!! Almost like what I think a re-birth would feel like. All of a sudden I had a purpose that I had laid down without having a clear plan as to where my feet may land. It was me jumping off a cliff...hoping to land on solid ground...yet not knowing if I would. For sure.

This past month has been different. Not in a way that anyone (other than myself...and possibly a few family members) would recognize. Unless they had know the "before" me. But I know. I know something has changed. Something good.

Being a worker all my natural life (from the age of 7 years), the transition from working with a schedule, to not working with a schedule, was daunting. To say the least...

I've never been one for marketing myself. Probably never will be. I have no need of becoming famous, so have always depended on word of mouth, and the knowledge of belonging to a God that is for me and not against me, has been my guiding light. I've always done what I've known to do and listened as best I could, for direction from Him who knows all things.

I've made my fair share of mistakes. But the way I see it, is, without mistakes we can't grow. Just like the natural body heals if it's cared for, so do the failures become successes when wisdom is applied as lessons are learned. Of this I am sure.

That morning I was speaking of? The morning I woke and felt new? The first thought that came through my waking moments was, "It's time to live again."

"It's time to live again." A second before that thought, I was sound asleep. And then the thoughts began to whirl...much like a dusty old fan had been turned back on. That's when you know you have been given instructions. For me...I knew.

I'm not completely sure what this all means. I don't have to. My days seem different now. I feel more awake, more alive. On a different path than the past "do nothing" year. "Lay back and take your ease" year. 

"You've earned it," just didn't settle well with me. 

And the beautiful rain falling this morning has been my inspiration to sit quietly, once again, to visit my blog site to create another memory for the times I forget.

Awake, and feeling alive, again...with plenty on my plate...

...As always, here you will find me...in Mary's World.

Something New Is Brewing...

Recently...just this past week...I've been working on something new. Something I never saw coming, until it did. 

It's not what I would have ever thought to do. At least I wouldn't have planned it out, which is what I usually do with anything new. Of course, there had to be planning (of a sort), but this planning didn't happen until the thought came front and center.

The reason I think it just might be the most unusual, never seen before, bend in the road...a turn that takes me out of my comfort zone, is simply because I would never have (on purpose) chose something so bizarre. Bizarre to me, at least... 

Well, Mary. What have you done now?

Honestly, I was searching for a way to create a stream of income outside of the usual monthly "allowance" we get from Social Security. Once a person hits retirement age (way past, for me), and actually retires, if feels as if everything is flowing out and not much flowing in. It can be a bit disconcerting. 

Where this particular advice came from, I couldn't tell you. It seemed a bit odd to me at first glance. And that, my friends, is what got my attention. It was something out of the norm of what I had found upon previous searches.

So now that you have the foundational information, I suppose it's time to say exactly what I'm dipping my toes into these days.

Okay...it's something I said I would never do. Doesn't it always happen that way? Never say never...

I have started a Facebook Group!!! Only because there aren't enough of those things. 🤣 

However, this group is different. Be honest. You knew it would be. Right? It is different in that even the title says, "What in the world???" 🤣🥴🤣🌿 At first glance, one might wonder how this could be a relevant group. But trust me...it's gonna be good!

It's a place where honest questions about hair issues someone may be having, will be answered (no matter the members age) in a welcoming environment. A non-judgmental environment. A "Pull Up A Chair" and let's have a conversation environment. 

Plans are to have a Hair Library.

1) Seasonal Hair

2) Gray Hair

3) Thinning Hair

4) Hair Myths

5) Salon Stories

There could be more. One never knows what the 'morrow may bring. We have only begun.

Plans are to post on Monday, Wednesday, & Friday.

Monday: "If You Were In My Chair" addressing practical tips, or a myth buster.

Wednesday: "Pull Up A Chair" with a conversation members want to talk about. If no one has a question for that particular week, I will use something from my most commonly asked questions when I was still working behind the chair.

Friday: "From Behind the Chair" will be little stories, a bit of encouragement, a seasonal reminder, or a possible reflection. Whatever my trusted archival brain brings front and center. 😁 Hopefully, members will leave with enough encouragement to put a really big smile on their faces.

That's what this little group is destined for. The main end desire, when I was still standing for 9-10 hours behind the chair, was to see a smile etch itself across my clients face. To see them walk just a little taller as they left the comforts of my salon. That hasn't changed. I love seeing people smile.

THAT is what I want for this "Ask A Retired Hairstylist" group! A place to feel like you are visiting with someone who actually cares about what you care about. 

A place much like what a porch light feels like. A place that shines to show a clear path. A welcoming environment. A place of safety. A place of truth.

A porch light, or possibly a sun room that has a large Boston Fern standing ornately in the corner windows, surrounded by comfortable seating and a place to sit a cup of coffee. A place to relax and simply visit.

And...in the future...should anyone need a one-on-one with me (through a Zoom meet up), there will be opportunity for that. Think of it as a private consultation. That is where one can get professional advice for a small fee.

This group is for common issues that may not be able to give distinct answers for individual distressed issues. Not all hair is "created" equal.😁

Our group is live. Now. It's a private group, just so we can keep it real. Yet, it's easy to join. Just copy and paste the URL below into your facebook search. OR do a search in FB groups for Ask A Retired Hairstylist.

Find it here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/4313356238928167

Being only a week old, we are still in the "tweaking" phase. That's got me written all over it🥴. A bit too anxious to get things moving before the over-all look has even been decided on. My salon without walls... 😁 Yep. Once I get an idea in my head....ugh! It's so hard to slow my roll...

As always, here you will find me...in Mary's World.

P.S.

My very old, sweet fern has been with me since our late July 2013 move from Oklahoma where she hung from the arbor that sat in our front yard. She rode in the back of D's pickup for 1200 miles of heat and wind, only getting nurtured at break stops along the way. She has sat in this corner since August 5th, 2013. She's tired. Not what she once was. But, hey! Aren't we all? 

See you in the new group?

I've Been Called Worse

I've been called Moco (long story)

I've been called Mama

I've been called Dear Auntie

I've been called Amazon Woman

I've been called Miracle Worker

But I've never been called "Delicate Flower", until now...

As strong and resilient as I have been in the past, it seems I must come to terms with being something I've never been before.

Most people (I think), when doing a 180...when pivoting from the norm..usually have a solid, trust worthy plan in place as to what the next chapter of their lives will look like. They head into it with enthusiasm and with the necessary equipment (mental & otherwise), they foresee needing, in a strange new world they are about to become a part of. 

That just wasn't me...

Yes, I grew up on a farm. Strength and resilience form within, stemming from inside ones mental and physical being. From extreme sweltering heat in the summer and debilitating freezing cold in the winter we rose to the challenge and conquered. A farm girl is up for it. Our bodies adjust to the elements as they knock at the door.

Yes, I was outside at least 12 hours each day. With 30 minutes (to an hour) for lunch. Should the gods smile on us, allowing our strength to replenish for the remaining hours needed to take care of business.

Farm business. Outside business. Business that was necessary to keep the family alive. And we did it without complaint. At least no complaining where any adult could hear us. Okay. Where Dad could hear us. He had a knack for solving a complaining spirit. And, I'm glad he stayed the course...

As the years turned me into a young adult, I left the confines of my training grounds. I was no longer needed outside to work the fields, the log woods, or the milking barn. Dad had begun the process of selling everything because of his failing health, and I was the only child left at home, required to milk (by hand) 20 head of holsteins...before school.

It was at this time, I became an "inside" girl. 

For the most part, it agreed with me. Sure, there were jobs I seriously dreaded facing. Most of them, actually. I hated factory work. I loathed waitressing (at least in the beginning). I did love the connection made with humanity (mostly), and the thanks I received of doing my job well; tips were amazing. This type of job became my norm for many years, mainly because of the freedom it gave me to work as long as I wanted and money was great. Because I was a worker.

Trained by the best. My Dad. Work was not a dirty word. It was a gift given by our Maker.

I left the restaurant & lounge business to train in cosmetology, later becoming a salon owner and stylist. For 50 years. It was a good run.

I don't know when my body decided it was going to start a rebellion against outside work. But it did. Maybe because it had become accustomed to controlled air conditioning in the hot summer months, and wood burning heat in the winter, rarely having to deal with the outside elements. At least not for long periods of time. And now I was asking it to conform back to working in nature, once again, only now with aging resources. 

For whatever reason, what my body had left to give me, decided to build a fire pit inside my core ready to ignite the minute I stepped into the heat of the day (hoping to change my mind) I suppose. If I pushed on regardless, and chose to stay in the heat (working...or just standing), within 15 minutes my skin felt the burn from inside as well as from the outside. Blisters showing themselves proud.

Looking back, I do believe it was telling me that enough was enough. The years this amazing conglomeration of cells, veins, muscles, blood and bone, had given to the cause, now decided it was time for a little R&R. A time for working a little less in the natural heat of the sun, and more in the unnatural cool of an AC. 

The problem with that was when it came time to retire (ugh...I still have a hard time saying that word), my mind was not ready to say, "Okay. You've earned it." My mind was trained to continue even in the hard places. Even when the body is weary. Or hot. Or both.

But change did come.

It has now been a full year, and I think I have finally come to grips with my world looking vastly different. My mind, and my body, have finally come together (while negotiating), and agreed they weren't finished. It was time to live again. Time to reconnect. Time to push until something foundational begins to surface, with both working towards the same goal.

Maybe this "new world" isn't that strange at all. Maybe this unlikely pivot, isn't a time for giving up. Maybe it's time for the culmination of what 79 years on this planet has produced for someone previously known as "Wonder Woman" & "Miracle Worker".

I can work with "Delicate Flower". For a season 😉

As always, here you will find me...in Mary's World.

P.S.

Isn't the next chapter of a book usually better than the one before?