When Beauty Becomes Ashes

Rain is my friend. I love rain. Everything about a rainy day calms my spirit. The sound of rain hitting the pavement; the way it cascades down my windshield as I drive; the cooler weather it brings with it during late Fall, early Winter. The smell of something fresh invites me to come outside and allow my senses to experience the blessings of the cooler weather rain brings. If I had a deck, I would be sitting there sipping Highlander Grogg coffee, or Creme Brulee...whichever Dennis decided to make for me. So, instead I use what I've got and stand on the front porch, with coffee in hand, as this morning air and gentle rain wipes away every negative thought, every anxious thought, and every fear of what may be in the future of my allotted days.

It's a little funny how something so beautiful, so relaxing, can also create more trouble than we desire. If the rain continues, day in and day out, it's not long before the earth cannot absorb this calming liquid that has been sent to us from the clouds above. Flooding may happen in low areas. And then, it becomes destructive.

As much as I love the rain, I really don't like huge amounts of water that have gathered in one place. It may be lovely to look at, to smell (well, at the beach anyway), to walk along the edges of...but it also can create a very dangerous situation. Like drowning.

When I was a small child, 9 or 10, maybe, one of my older brothers threw me into the deep end of a creek bed. "Sink or swim," he said. I had wanted to learn how to swim for a very long time, but was just too afraid to go out into deeper waters to try. He thought I would surely fight to live and thereby, swim! Nope...he was wrong. Fear paralyzed me. I was going down for the third time, when my protective sister (Becky) swam out to grab me. Brother Rush soon wished he'd not been quite so confident of my survival.

Maybe that's why I fear the ocean. Or it could be something altogether different. I've had/have, a few fears other than what Rush (unintentionally) helped create. However, I simply call this fear a healthy respect of danger. True, it's wonderful to walk along the beaches and allow the winds that blow over the waters, to wrap around you. I also love the sudden thunder storms and the gathering black clouds, that seem to come out of nowhere, while walking along the shore line. But it is quite difficult to get me onto a boat of any kind. I'm getting better, I think. But I have to command my mind to be at peace. Cruises are definitely out, at the moment. Ferry rides are okay...

Moral of this story? The things you love the most can become a danger if there is over-participation. We are to do all things in moderation. Too much of a good thing can indeed become a not-so-good thing. And yet here I go, walking into the deep...

Here's my list of beauty becoming a form of death:

1. Being with someone (anyone) ALL. THE. TIME. We need a breather, a time to reflect, a time for God. What was at the beginning beautiful, has now become fearful. Fear of loss...

2. Being so spiritual that others feel you believe yourself better than they. Let me clarify, please. Being sensitive to God's spirit in us, is indeed the best way to live our lives. It's our connection to the God of all Creation. But, if everything we say and do finds us surrounded by "those of the faith", we will never reach the lost for Christ. We will become churchy with a list do's & do not's as our necks become stiffer and stiffer.  We're simply too good to dirty ourselves. Yet, we ourselves, were once lost, and at times STILL look a little dirty. What was at the beginning beautiful, has now become fearful. Fear of loss...

3. Using all our resources and plenty, on ourselves. What God has blessed us with, we want more and more of. Nothing wrong with that. Right? Wrong. It develops a greedy spirit within us. We are to be conduits of God's grace and mercy, and not in the form of just a hug and a prayer. What was at the beginning beautiful, has now become fearful. Fear of loss...

4. Food...oh my goodness, FOOD! It truly can be a thing of beauty, needed for survival, and enjoyed at gatherings. But...it can quickly become a form of death. Too much, too much of the time, begins to weigh a person down, literally. Organs in the body that are meant to protect, get weighed down and become dysfunctional. Or they are destroyed all together, breaking down our defense against bacteria, disease, and emotional stability. What was at the beginning beautiful, has now become fearful. Fear of loss...

5. Beauty itself. Recently, I came across a show on TV, called BOTCHED. Botched is a show about fixing surgeries that have gone wrong. It's actually pretty, no, it's VERY interesting. And amazing! These doctors reverse botched up works of other professionals; surgeries I think should be categorized as "impossibility." What was at the beginning beautiful, has now become fearful. Fear of loss.

I'm confident there are items we all could add to this list, but these are the 5 things that came to mind this morning as I watched the rain, coming down in all it's beauty, in it's service to me. 

Ready for this God given day, here you'll find me...in Mary's World.