Things I Learned Two Days Ago...I Think

Dennis and I went, for the first time since moving here, to the NC State Fair this past Monday. Here's what I learned:

1. Never give advice (or suggestions) to another Senior Citizen.
    It was pretty dang cold Monday morning. Waiting in line to board a transit bus, the wind gently caressed and enveloped all that were standing there. The lady directly in front of me had very short hair, ears exposed to the blustery day. I should have kept my mouth shut.

2. I am a Senior Citizen.
   The bus was loaded with old people. As far as the eye could see, forward and backwards, people with canes, no hair, and very slow, to non-existent, movement. I wondered how they would make it up those hilly inclines at the fairgrounds. So, evidently, transits are for the elderly. I didn't know that...but now I do. I like transits.

3. My memory is fleeting.
    Entering the fairgrounds, the gate keeper informed me I was not "over the hill". I was merely an "informed adult", or an "informed individual", or a "mature adult", or a "mature individual"...whatever, you get the picture. I really don't remember. And actually whatever it was she said, I forgot after taking approximately 10 steps forward...but I liked it. Whatever it was. By now I was beginning to really appreciate being a senior citizen. It seems to be a good luck charm when going anywhere. Discounts all over the place. AND a free pass into the fair! Ha! Dennis had to pay $10 to experience the same things I experienced for $0.00! (Big smiley face goes here).

4. Expect lines to move slowly.
    No one seems to be in a hurry in the world of seniors. It just takes time to sort through which archived money one should use. Cash? If so, from which secret pocket in the purse should it be taken from? The Christmas Fund? The Loose Cash Fund? The "Saved for a Rainy Day" Fund? The "Where Did THAT Come From Fund"? Maybe one should just use that piece of plastic and hold onto the cash. But which Credit Card? Which Debit Card? Better use one that is covered of fraudulent charges just in case the vendor decides to keep the info on the card. Decisions, decisions. (Memo: I don't have all this free flowing cash; in case you're thinking of following me, with intent of knocking me in the head).

5. Expect detours while on the fairgrounds. (Go ahead and speculate on what that means exactly...)

6. There is more than one way to cook bacon.
    This one I learned from a total stranger I found myself talking to, about a ceramic bacon fryer, in a pottery vendors palace. Strangers become good friends by the time you reach mature adulthood. We welcome ANY interaction, since family has their own life to live and it rarely interacts with yours. So...the bacon recipe. The bacon in the picture looked limp and icky. My new found friend had the perfect solution, and  I'm going to try her suggestion. Hummmm....maybe I'm NOT a senior citizen. Taking suggestions, and all...
    Here's the how-to:  Layer bacon on aluminum foiled cookie sheet
                                   Cook in oven at 350 degrees, for 10 minutes
It's supposed to come out very crispy with no spattering mess to clean up. Awesome.

7. Football really does unite people across the globe.
    Dennis had several strangers stop to talk football. All because he wore his colors. When leaving the fairgrounds, a "mature adult" walked past and said, ever so nonchalantly, "Boomer", with which Dennis replied, ever so nonchalantly, "Sooner." Without looking back, she exclaimed to her husband, "He's a real one." Of course they had to be stopped and visited with.

8. Seniors, even though they have a couple of years to go before being legally known as a "Senior Citizen" (aka the one who still has to pay to get into the Fair), will develop pain in the lower torso that travels down at least one leg and into the same foot after walking a few hours up and down hilly terrain, but still gets a kick out of holding hands with people dressed as Mother Earth and walks on stilts.

The REAL Senior just put this in her memory bank. The bank that serves her well...for the next 10 forward steps.

9. If you keep watch on the time in the midst of all the fun of eating funnel cakes, hot, homemade apple pie with stone cold vanilla ice-cream on top, chili dogs, turkey legs, onion rings, and hot apple cider, and visiting with total strangers (and strange people in general), and taking time to admire the beauty of the florists gardens...the transit will get you home before dark.

WHERE ARE ALL THE PICTURES I WAS SUPPOSED TO TAKE?!!

Thankfully, I still know my way home...here, in Mary's World.

Jealousy's Fire

She was wed just over a year when the President of a well-to-do bank asked her if she would be interested in working for him as a bank teller in their loan department. Working as a waitress, she had brought food to his table many times. He took notice of her work ethics; her quickness of hand, her ability to meet the public with a smile, and a true desire to please.

She had been employed at the bank for only a week, when her trainer met with the boss to give him a review of the first week and how the new girl handled herself. "She's a fast learner," the trainer said. "I don't think we should keep her in bookkeeping. She needs to be up front, meeting and serving the public," said the trainer.

Well into the first year of being employed by the busiest bank in town, and the greatest boss of all time, the new girl was given more and more responsibility. She loved her job. She felt important. The President would stop by her window and visit every day. They laughed together, shared stories, and became friends. He felt he had made a good choice in her.

Having worked on a farm, the new girl wasn't afraid of work...nor did she consider work to be a dirty word. She loved using her hands to produce something bigger than herself. She loved being needed. When her work was complete, she would find someone to help that may be having trouble finishing before the end of their day. Always wanting to help others, she never felt as if she was hired for just one job; but to actually be a team player. Everyone enjoyed working with her. All but one girl...

Jealousy raged within this one girl. She had watched as the President came every day to visit with the new girl. She had noticed the new girl was given a large bonus at Christmas, only a few months after her hire-in date. She notice it was hand delivered by the President, even though the new girl asked to be excused from the Christmas party where the bonuses were handed out. The party the employees had always been required to attend or they would have to forfeit their bonuses. She had noticed how quickly the new girl had gained popularity and she was not okay with that.

One afternoon, about closing time, the mail pile was high. The new girl noticed this and asked if she could help. The one girl was not making much headway in getting all the accounts posted in payments receivable. The new girl was being kind and wanted to help out. And even though the insurance department was helping with the mail, the one girl did not want the new girl anywhere around her. But, alas, the work must be done. The boss said, "let her help."

As the new girl reached for a stack of mail, the one girl glared, with head down, and never spoke a word to the new girl. Never acknowledged the new girl was there. "Are you okay?" the new girl asked. With voice low and filled with hate, the one girl said, "I hate you." The new girl was completely caught off guard. Her honest heart tried to process what she had just been told. "Why do you hate me?" the new girl ventured. "I don't know. I just hate you," responded the one girl, all the while never allowing their eyes to meet.

That was 38 years ago...and the new girl still shudders when she remembers that day.

"So what?" you ask. Is there a moral to this story? It continues to amaze me at just how damaging our words can be. And how life giving they can be. Words can damage a spirit for an eternity, it would seem. They can also lift and encourage for an eternity, it would seem. So why do we find it necessary to wound, to scar others, to convince them they aren't worth our time? I don't know that I'll ever know the complete answer to those questions. Other than the damaging effects that self-centeredness creates in us, these hating words must come from a heart filled with need. Material songs have been written about it. Like, "I Need You to Need Me", "Shake It Off", "Hater's Are Gonna Hate", and the list goes on & on.

The Scriptures tell us "The tongue has the power of life and death." ~Proverbs 18:21, and, "With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse human beings, who have been made in God's likeness."  ~James 3:9 

Signing off, for today, maybe we can ask of the Lord to settle these words, from Psalm 19:14, deep in our spirit. And maybe...just maybe, we'll make it through the day with a lightness in our heart and kind words on our lips. "Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart, be acceptable in Thy sight, O LORD, my strength, and my redeemer." ~Psalm 19:14

As always, here you'll find me...in Mary's World

I Fear We Know Not the True Meaning of Love

We say, "I love you," but when the test comes to prove our love, we fail miserably.

"Love" is a word thrown around much too freely, in my opinion. Love lives through adversity, through injustice, through the times we feel most defeated. That is where we find just how much we truly love one another.

Love survives the pain and never acts unbecomingly. Love takes hits and does not react with revenge at it's heart. Love cannot hate. Love cannot do anything but love, in spite of what it must endure.

Do we love simply when others are behaving how we think they should? How we desperately need them to? Do we love only when the one we say we love, compliments who we are? Or do we throw stones at our offender? Do we alienate them because they hurt us and knocked us off our feet with their actions, or do we learn patience in the midst of the storm? Are we capable of holding onto hope, when there seems none exists?

Do we resort to throwing stones, or at least, stony stares, at those we believe to have made a horrible mistake? Or do we simply ignore them? You know the ones..the ones we told a long time ago that we loved. Those who we believe to have sinned against all things holy...and US! Those people. I'm reminded of the Scripture in John 8:7, where Jesus was writing in the sand, as those who stood around Him were wanting to stone a woman caught in adultery. By-the-way, does anyone know where the guy was? Why wasn't HE brought to Jesus, as well? I guess she should have known better. He was just doing what guys do. Right? It had to be all her. He was just an innocent by-stander. Jesus had another thought about all that. He told them, "He who is without sin among you, let him be the first to throw a stone at her."

For the last few years, I have been fascinated with this powerful word. Love; the word many of us seem to use when we actually mean, "You make me happy." Love was never intended to make us happy. Grateful, maybe...but, happy? Happy is as emotion that comes from being satisfied with an outcome. May I say, it's even a selfish emotion? An emotion that fades and is never consistent. It's prominent  one day, and the next, not so much. We may have even grown to hate, what we thought we once "loved." And, I say it all too often, myself! "I LOVE this weather!" "I LOVE how she/he looks (or carries themselves)!" "I LOVE this pizza!" "I LOVE YOU!?" And, let's not forget the sentimental love phrase, "I love you like you were one of my own." Or, "I'll always love you!" What happens to that love once the storms of life hit? Is that love still visible?  Does our heart scream in pain because of the love we shared with another and now seems distant? And how do we show it, if it does still remain? Can love actually be alive one day and not the next? I think not. Love is stable...always. Love is an action. It has your back when you've fallen. It never spreads gossip about you. It never kicks you when you're down. Never. Do we love...or are we just happy in the moment?

Love came to us as a sacrifice. To love is to sacrifice, even when the other seems to have been captured by aliens. Love is visible for all to see. Love is demonstrated. It seems that we honor our personal feelings above almost everything. We do what we want when we want because we "feel" like it. And if we don't "feel" like it, we don't do it. We need to know what love is. What it looks like when acted out.

According to I Corinthians 13:4-8a
1. Love is patient (suffers a long time, if need be)
2. Love is kind (but often tough)
3. Love is not jealous (jealousy cannot exist with love in the same heart)
4. Love does not brag (showing spiritual immaturity)
5. Love is not arrogant (grasping for power...control...disrespectful)
6. Love does not act unbecomingly (rude actions)
7. Love does not seek it's own agenda (demanding, dominating)
8. Love is not provoked (not given to emotional outbursts)
9. Love does not take into account a wrong suffered (does not hang onto reminders of wrongs)
10. Love does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth (does not pat themselves on the back when someone has a shortcoming, because "they would never do that.")
11. Love bears all things (protects others)
12. Love believes all things (gives others the benefit of the doubt)
13. Love hopes all things (refuses to take failure as final)
14. Love endures all things (holds fast to the people it loves)
15. Love never fails ('nuff said)

We come up short, many times, thinking we really show love easily, when in reality, we show love when it is reciprocated to our satisfaction. It's a tough one, to be sure. None of us love perfectly, but we can grow in our understanding and application of love. We just need to identify it.

All three types of love, Eros (Greek for desire & longing), Philos (a friend that sticks closer than a brother, type of love), and Agape (unconditional love for anyone & everyone), are all governed by the above description. So...do we really love?

When God gets my attention on something, and won't allow me to shake it loose...when He continues to bring it into my conscience thoughts, I must ask myself, "What am I missing? What have I yet to learn about this?" And it is beating at my door today.

As always, here you'll find me...in Mary's World.