Once the brakes are applied, it's really easy to sit back and "let the good times roll." Or to stare aimlessly out the study window. Trust me. I know something about this. Eight months in, and my body is yelling for attention. It's not known what to do with nothing to do for approximately 78 years, 8 months, & 2 days. A new world has emerged. Still...it's a pretty decent world! It's just this old body is having it's "stiffness." Still keeps up, but has to try a bit harder.
I'm finding out just how disciplined I am. And let me tell you...it's scary! I keep hearing voices that say its time to take my ease. "You've worked hard your whole life." "You've earned this rest." "It's okay to relax." Right. When has anyone known me to relax? I've been a pretty tense person most of my life.
The problem??? Relaxing feels sooooooooo good!!! Until it doesn't...
Today is a beautiful misty morning, with showers expected in just about 3 hours. This kind of weather is calming when I take my walks. Sadly, I've been relaxing just a bit too much these days, and walking has become a spur-of-the-moment deal. Not good discipline. Oh, I keep the laundry up (most of the time), keep the house tidy (most spaces), and visit the greenhouse to care for those who can't care for themselves. But that's about the scope of my busyness.
I do keep my early mornings open to sit with the Word, stay still and listen for the slightest bit of wisdom that comes only from above. This morning I fell asleep (shhhh...you love it too when your child falls asleep on your lap) while listening to a reading from Luke 9 where Jesus corrals his disciples and tells them it's time for them to take up the staff as they proclaimed the kingdom of God. Yet, discipline doesn't come easy for these guys. Nor for anyone.
Even though they had been given the authority needed for what they would encounter (we actually have that as well) they were still in the learning stage, and quite frankly, acted as though they were toddlers just learning to walk. Because they were.
As the day wears on, Jesus informs his disciples about the upcoming trial and death. Not once, but twice. He knew they were likely to brush it off and not really consider what it actually means to be a follower of Christ. I'll let you find out on your own. Just read Luke 9. There, you will get a feel for it.
Spoiler Alert: It requires discipline to the nth degree.
Soooo...back to brakes being applied in my world of worldly discipline, that also requires a full tank of discipline. When one has a responsibility, such as a job provides, one rises to meet the challenge. Daily. It's just a given if you want to eat, pay the bills, and lay your head at night, in peace. Once that is no longer a thing to be had, well, responsibility weakens. Especially until one pivots and declares a new challenge. A new way forward. Requiring discipline to once again become engaged.
Could someone pry my foot off the brake, or please, just inject me with imagination blockers?
I don't mind the slow roll; just don't want to stop and stare.
As always, here you will find me...in Mary's World.
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