From time to time we find ourselves speculating about this or that. We are told never to speculate, because speculation creates sad hearts as the truth emerges. Sometimes we may even fantasize about how things should or could be, and wonder why they aren't. Rarely do those scenarios play out in our realities, because they aren't within our reach...for one reason or another. They are only desires of the heart. A need we think we have, that isn't being filled.
So what does one do to keep from sinking into despair? To keep from feeling completely alone? I know what the easy road is, the road that beckons as we face the same situation day after day after day. It's withdrawing into a shell, created from the pain of what we see as rejection. It's pretending everything is just fine and dandy...when in reality the heart literally hurts, feeling stuck, with no place of escape. Or we will choose to lash out in unbecoming anger that neither helps nor resolves anything.
We are told to "take care of yourself, because no-one else will." What a sad statement. But...as in everything under the sun, there is a bit of truth in that lie. We must be the one that walks through this great deception, even though there may be others that will walk beside us. No one can change our despair, other than the God of truth. And if we've allowed ourselves to sink into the mire of self-pity, then it just may be a long trek.
For many years I've said, "For every problem, there's a solution." That being true, the steps needed to find most solutions are foggy, at best, if the first one is omitted. We are so used to using our own mental resources for resolving issues that are messing with us, we forget to include the One that set all things in motion. And the problem gets much bigger than we ever expected it would.
Step 1:
We must go to the Father of light...the God of creation...the Redeemer of broken hearts...the Healer of all wounds..the One who frees the captives, the prisoners...the One who comforts those who mourn. ~Isaiah 61:1 If we acknowledge His wisdom in all things, He will direct us. ~Proverbs 3:6 (paraphrased)
Step 2:
Step back and take another look at what the truth of the matter is. Don't allow emotions to dictate the situation.
Step 3:
Cry if you must. Tears are actually healing, in and of themselves. We always feel somewhat better after a good cry. Mourning is not a bad thing. We must allow it on occasion. Mourn, then get on with life the best way you know how.
Step 4:
Always choose to find the good in any given situation. It's easy to see the not-so-good. Too easy. That alone should tell us it's trying to imprison us. Even if the problem truly is horrible, there will always be some good to be found...if we but look for it. It may not show itself for a while, but it will be there.
Step 5:
If we begin to slip back into old habits of speculation, review Step 1.
King David had his fair share of problems. At one point, all the men that served in his army prepared to stone him because they blamed him for causing the destruction of their homes, with their wives and children being taken captive. Stoning in that day was not just throwing rocks at someone. They used huge boulders that crushed the body. David could have despaired to the point of withdrawing in his shell and he never would have conquered his enemy, and gotten back the wives and children. But he didn't. David encouraged himself by incorporating Step 1. He asked the Lord what he should do. You'll find his story in I Samuel 30.
I'm not saying I'm anywhere close to having the problems David did. But he had the right idea. Some things we just can't handle ourselves.
Tonight, I choose to follow David's lead. Tonight, here in Mary's World, I will encourage myself in the Lord...and ask of Him.
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